We are playing 5 card draw. If you win, you get to ask someone to remove one piece of clothing. Shoes and socks don't count. If you run out of clothes, then you can either quit or play on with other rules." Everyone agreed and they looked at their cards. My wife took 3 new cards and my uncle and my brother took none. Bill said, "All right, lay your cards down." My wife looked down and yelled, "Yes, I win with 1 pair." That looked suspicious to me as it seemed like they threw the first round to my wife for some reason. She looked right at Bill and said, "Bill, let me have that shirt!" Bill took off his shirt and tossed it to her. Bill's chest was now exposed for everyone to see and he definitely trimmed up a bit since the last time I saw him. He traded his little beer belly for a six pack of abs. My wife seemed very pleased that she won round 1. They seemed to pull the same stunt on the second hand as my wife won again. She asked my uncle for his shirt. After he took it off, his. A paper route paid about 2 to 10 dollars a day depending on how many papers were delivered, plus the usual Christmas and birthday bonus.Snow shoveling ... lawn mowing, apple picking, cherry picking, hay baling, weeding mint, harvesting assorted crops, babysitting, delivery boy ... I could do all those. I talked to my dad."Somebody get me my pills," he shouted. "David wants a job!" Very funny, daddy."He laughed until I thought he might really need some. When he finally quit, he asked, "what for? Soda? Gum? Condoms?" He lost it again...Remember? ... I have a bigger dick...I mentioned that. He quit laughing and started grumbling, "yeah, yeah, yeah. Don't rub it in. What do you need?" as he fumbled in his pocket change, "50 cents?" Tell you what," I replied. "I'll make a bet with you. I pick the winner of the Kentucky Derby, and you set me up a stock market account with one thousand dollars in it." What happens if you're wrong?" Daddy loves the races."You choose." I choose? What does that.
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